November 20 8:24pm

Odds and sods

• Funeral: …the word funeral starts with the word fun….have we been pronouncing it wrong this whole time?!

• Nutrition: A few people have asked and I realized I never did report back about my conversation with the doctors regarding Fraser’s ‘food’ and ‘nutrition’. When it was my ‘turn’ during Rounds, I asked if all the doctors fought bacterial infections with coke and/or sugars. Was that their standard go-to for not only patients but themselves? They all shook their heads ‘no’. I then said, ‘well,  one department is actively feeding bacteria through their ‘nutrition’ of corn-syrup; maltodextrin and Palm kernel oil, while every other department is actively doing what they can to fight bacteria’. The attending doctor kept nodding his head and said to the other doctors that they were excellent observations and kind of shook his head when it was put to him like that. At the time I asked if I could bring in a bone broth as that would be a better option. The ‘nutritionist’ said it wouldn’t be fortified with enough calories. I asked her how many amazing calories were in corn-syrup and surely she is aware calories are not all created equally? She put her head down and said, ‘unfortunately we are limited by our supplier’. I looked at each doctor and said, ‘yes, because we all know that Nestle loves and cares about our health’. I ended with, ‘if this is about health what are we doing for patients’? The attending doctor was grateful for the questions and observations…the next morning Fraser’s ‘food’ was changed to a different (only slightly better), higher protein based supplement….with no corn syrup.

• Dogs: The morning that Fraser passed we brought Faya to the hospital. We were all curious how she would react. She jumped on his bed and, we knew. She simply sniffed him and jumped off the bed. He was gone; still ‘here’ but only in a physical sense. I’m sure she sensed him all around. And with that consideration it was slightly easier to manage the rest of what happened that day.

• Policies: policies are great…except when they are stupid. I called to have Fraser’s card put on hold but it’s the bank’s policy to cancel all cards…she didn’t tell me until it was completed. Cool. I would have been better off lying and saying it was a lost card. I asked her if I could change my mind…but I said it through tears or it would have had a great effect…I’m sure.

• Cause of death: Fraser’s official cause of death is ‘Pending’. ‘Traumatic Brain Injury’ was the initial cause, but it took them 12 days to release his body and could take up to a year (or more) for neuro-pathology to find the cause…if they can. I have some thoughts....or at least two of them.

• Life insurance:….I thought we had ‘A’ policy. Apparently we ‘each’ have (had) a policy. So, when I renewed ‘the’ policy in August…they only renewed mine. SCREECH They reviewed the phone call and Fraser’s was reinstated today as that was clearly the intent of the phone call. If anything I wanted at least our premiums back. Life Insurers use BMI so Fraser, at nearly 6’5” and 290lbs (when we got the insurance), was considered ‘morbidly obese’….his doctor even wrote them a note which they denied. So, I’ll be getting those very high premiums back and a bit more. Grateful..and also…F You!

• I am tired today and my body hurts. Apparently I carry stress in my neck. Sometimes people carry it in their lower back or shoulders….mine is definitely my neck. I’m adding myself to the list of things…it might just be a week before I can get to it. Terrible are we who treat others. 😉

• And yes, for those of you asking, I am eating. I know food fuels our body, I just don't need as much fuel at the moment....and sleeping is ok...until it's not. That's just the way for now. I did wake up at 3:30 am the other morning and found some snacks. I couldn't figure out how my Mom knew...but apparently I left the container on the counter. Lol

• I have an awesome idea for an app to help people in critical circumstances. Any app developers out there? I will be getting an account if anyone wants to donate to it too...I've shared the idea and I think it's a good one!

• The business of making Fraser and/or his name ‘disappear’ (cleaning his desk; credit cards and banking etc) hurts my head....but mostly my heart. Early bed for me…many tasks still need to get done…and we still have a FUNeral to plan.🙏

Sweet dreams,

Brooke

P.S. Birth certificates and marriage certificates...those should be together in the file with a copy of your will...and personal directives😉